You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
