I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liz is crying about burritos again.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize