summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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