I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Randomize
