it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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