no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
my vag is so smooth its legendary
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
