: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
i dont even know how to be here
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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