When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
