Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize