Texts From Last Night

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  (315): View more from New York

  i think i just puked on my phone

  (1-315): View more from New York

  we live great lives

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  (315): i think i just puked on my phone (1-315): we live great lives http://tfl.nu/f3zx
  Replies (10) Good night (1847) Bad night (729) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.

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  (240): EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff. http://tfl.nu/5eqp
  Replies (21) Good night (3146) Bad night (878)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.

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  (954): Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers. http://tfl.nu/re05
  Replies (3) Good night (3546) Bad night (744) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.

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  (970): I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen. http://tfl.nu/rv6x
  Replies (5) Good night (616) Bad night (3748) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'

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  (902): Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp' http://tfl.nu/0a7v
  Replies (8) Good night (1130) Bad night (3694) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg

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  (509): I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg http://tfl.nu/tr8k
  Replies (6) Good night (2158) Bad night (711) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.

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  (403): My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind. http://tfl.nu/y5d8
  Replies (15) Good night (3930) Bad night (798) Order T-Shirt
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.

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  (260): Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide. http://tfl.nu/8iit
  Replies (4) Good night (544) Bad night (1772) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.

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  (502): Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it. http://tfl.nu/685d
  Replies (2) Good night (1624) Bad night (712) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Who wants vodka and apple sauce

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  (608): Who wants vodka and apple sauce http://tfl.nu/g86m
  Replies (4) Good night (791) Bad night (358) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.

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  (707): because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie. http://tfl.nu/erv7
  Replies (1) Good night (518) Bad night (314) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?

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  (914): He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf? http://tfl.nu/eppt
  Replies (4) Good night (237) Bad night (797) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,

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  (603): well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge, http://tfl.nu/ijq7
  Replies (0) Good night (605) Bad night (154) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.

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  (610): The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable. http://tfl.nu/zn9i
  Replies (1) Good night (225) Bad night (771) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.

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  (202): I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in. http://tfl.nu/a062
  Replies (21) Good night (1206) Bad night (815)

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