you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...