Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.