She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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