how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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