My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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