ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
