Where are you?
In a non slutty way
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
