what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
