i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
is that a dick in a sweater?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
