When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
