Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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