with your own penis?
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
