I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
