I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
