he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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