Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I need moral support for this bender
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
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