So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
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did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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