I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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