Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize