But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
