dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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