Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
