...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
