hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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