my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
