Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
