your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
She said her name was "party"
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
