They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Don't EVER smell your tampon
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
