He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Drunk is not a location!
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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