My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
