If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
