I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
you never un-have a 4some
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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