Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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