It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
