I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
he told me I talked like a deaf person
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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