All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
