I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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