First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
