Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
