I think I am morally bankrupt
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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