He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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