I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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